Tag Archive: problem


Is Technology just Novelty?

For my birthday I got a Galaxy S5 and I love it. My old iPhone 4 was getting pretty slow. It was painful to do anything on the Facebook app. Suddenly it was like a new world opened up to me and I started blogging, chatting, tweeting and posting like I once did…then I got caught up…and ended up in the same place I was not too much earlier.

Facebook still does not have an abundance of good stuff to read, blogging still takes a few minutes to sit down and think of something worthwhile to write. Reading still takes time to digest and is still not as valuable unless I take notes.

I have found that it is the novelty of a new device (before the new phone it was a windows tablet that I ended up reading comic books on more than anything…) that rekindles the desire to participate online.

And once again I feel the sting of a truth that I, and I am sure many others, just simply wish was not true. That solutions to struggles cannot be completely solved online or through a new phone, tablet or whatever.

Granted they can help in some aspects. My current problem is that I need to make a few extra thousand dollars before a trip to the states. I have chatted with people about it and the best we have come up with is mowing yards on the side. So I have done what I can online and with the phone but now I need to go get the mower,  go to houses to get the clients and so on.

But I still keep checking Facebook hoping that more of the work will have been done for me or that I can even do the work while laying in bed and between games of ‘Cut the Rope’.

I know that many astounding things have happened online so i don’t rule it out, but I will always firmly believe that somewhere along the line the, “metal has to meet the meat” as they would say in army terms, to have something beneficial happen for you and another party.

What are your thoughts, is being on your device all day starting to feel like a vacuum as well?

The Most Frustrating Thing

I have recently become debt free, have started to save thousands of dollars and  got a promotion at work.  Things have been going really well for me and I am elated that I have reached many goals that I have set not too long ago.   Yet I am still frustrated internally.  I am fretful all the time.  When there are things to be done and deadlines I feel trapped and anxious, when there is free time I get fretful again thinking I should be doing something.  Upon excessive thinking and driving all over the place to relax I have found what may be the cause of my frustration.

I have been thinking of a post like this for a few weeks now.  I keep putting it off or rather just didn’t make myself do it until now.  That is my biggest problem.  There was something inside my mind, something that I should do or write and I don’t.  The longer I don’t the more I regret it.  Then I eventually lose it.

After writing goals and deadlines, or putting the date on ideas that I want to do, I become sickened by how long ago I had an idea and when I finally see that note again a year or more has flew by.  Now granted I am not doing poorly, from the first statement above you can tell that things are going really well, but still the frustration lingers.

I started this post on my tablet one night and then the missionaries from my church came for a visit.  These are always great cause I rant and rave about whatever topic comes up till I am blue in the face, and on this visit I spoke of all the controversies that inundate Facebook and how no one listens and no one cares, so it is just spinning wheels.  Then I went on to say, “if people really wanted to improve the world they would improve themselves, they would start in their own home and become an amazing father, or an amazing mother.  They would take care of themselves, get out of debt, figure out how to earn more money…and by being their best they would improve their situations, their lives and thus improve the world and later have real ability to help people around them become better and more fulfilled…thus improving the world even more so!”

I thought this was a great breakthrough, while this was in my mind for the longest time I did not have the words.  As I thought more about it and how I could enact on my own sermon the reason for my constant frustration became a little clearer.  The most frustrating thing is that we are capable, and know that we are capable of so much.  That we can have what we want and others can too…BUT we don’t cause we constantly allow small failures, habits and addictions to slowly ruin our lives.

Think about it, have you even decided to go to the gym, you are driving there and at the last turn don’t make that tiny effort to turn the wheel and you drive past and just waste that time or go back home and watch TV?  Have you tried quick drinking caffeine and rebound because you were just bored? These, among many other examples, fill our lives and then we wonder why we are tired and anxious.

I propose that it is just not the bad habits and failures that drag us down so low, but that we know on some level that we could have done better.  How scary it is to think that I would wake up at 40, 10 years from now and had done more of the same from age 20 to 30.  That hundreds of thousands of little choices buried me in the same mediocre person that I have been.

I don’t need to get more tasks done in a day, I just have to make the right decision in the right moment.  No more effort will be required than if I had made wrong choice, but often things are worse off if do.  I save nothing by neglecting a work out.  You may argue time but really how is that hour used that day that you did not work out?  Pay attention…you will find that you are cheating yourself…over and over and over again.  And THAT is frustrating! 

This has been an awful awful awful week.  I started out last weekend getting a little tickle in my throat, and I always know that if my brain registers a constant slight tickle, that it will progress to to full blown sore throat from Hell.  I tried taking Airbourne and and Vitamin C, as well as eat and orange and it’s peel…but anyhow I got a nasty sore throat.

Had trouble sleeping at all two days this week, my two year is having weird poo’s because of iron supplements that we have to give her, and the Sales job is just stressing me out.  People want a song and dance and a product in hand before they will even humour the idea of thinking about buying something from your company.

But back to the title of this post.  My biggest fantasy is that I can solve a major life problem over the weekend.  I delude myself to thinking that if I write an incredible blog post, then I will get more hits and then someone will want to pay me for being awesome…that is where is breaks down, I know that I am not in the mode of ever paying someone else just for being awesome.

So then I think I will work on my books and then people will buy them and I can pay the bills!  But after taking a Tylenol with Codine in it I was just staring at the wall and almost drooling.  So I am trying to not take the painkiller for my throat and get something done, but now I am just grumpy cause my throat aches intensely.  Over a week long sore throat?! Really!? Why? There is just no reason for that, it is un-called for as my dad would always say.

There is a neat job in San Antonio, Texas that is right up my alley, pays well and all that fun stuff.  But after seeking some counsel from my dad he said that I would need at least $5,000 to make the move, and probably another $5,000 to get settled in.  So there is nothing I can do there to make that happen over the weekend. I know this is true cause I have moved on a whim twice now and it is always a bad idea unless you have a slush fund to do it.

Went to a community education forum meeting last night.  While it was nice to get validated on what I was telling people is what everyone else is experiencing too, I was disappointed that no talk was made about what to do and how to do it.  It is like we all walked out to a canyon that we all desperately want to cross, and we say, “oh yes, that is a deep canyon…oh yes that is a difficult thing to get across…are we all in agreement? Great, see you all later.”  How about HOW are we going to cross it?  A bridge? Great idea, who knows how to build a bridge? How much will it cost?  Are we willing to pay for it? And so on, so frustrated, yes, that is almost my mantra is to be frustrated.  I will just say it out loud cause a good friend of mine will read this post sooner or later and she will comment that I sound frustrated…yet again!

So I have this weekend, where no one can bug me with due cause, I can have some time to myself, my wife is really good at letting me be or letting me go for a drive in the name of doing something to better the family situation or even just for myself.

I broke down and played Starcraft II on the 9th, I was suppose to go till the 11th, but I just couldn’t think of what else to do, not playing has gotten me to write some good stuff and be fairly productive, but that productivity still did not produce much of anything.  All three games that I played were Terran vs. Terran and I won all three… if that makes any difference.

Stick a fork in me, I am done!  My biggest comfort so far is listening to the Beatles singing “Let it Be”.